GM. This is Dumb Money, rounding up the internet's biggest Ls so you don't make them yourself.
Yesterday was a masterclass in bad timing. $183K in combined losses across a Solana memecoin that stopped existing, a pharma options play that aged like milk, and a forex position that lasted shorter than a lunch break.
Three stories. Three different ways to set money on fire. All educational.
Here's what we've got today:
🏆 Loss of the Day - $91,400 into a Solana memecoin with cartoon moon robots. Dev pulled liquidity on day three.
📈 Casualty #1 - 300 Novo Nordisk call contracts before Capital Markets Day. Down 8% in one session.
⚡ Casualty #2 - Long GBP/USD at 50x leverage. Liquidated in 38 minutes by a dollar rally.
🍪 Copium for the Road - The best cope from today's comment sections.
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Legendary investor Stanley Druckenmiller once said:
“You don't get rich by diversifying into 50 mediocre assets. You get rich by finding two or three asymmetric home runs.”
Jeff Brown just found this NEW asymmetric home run he calls “Elon Musk’s One Stock Retirement Plan.” (Click here for details.)
LOSS OF THE DAY 🏆
Every day we crown one person who made the worst financial decision on the internet.
Today's winner didn't just lose money. He funded a stranger's retirement.
Here's the setup. A new Solana token called $LUNARBRO appeared on pump.fun three days ago. The pitch: AI-powered lunar mining protocol.
The whitepaper was seven pages of diagrams showing robots on the moon. The Telegram had 4,200 members. The chart was a 45-degree angle pointing up.
Our guy saw the chart. He checked the Telegram. He read the whitepaper.
He put in $91,400. From a personal loan at 11.9% APR.
One problem: the dev wallet held 41% of the total supply. This was visible on-chain. Over 300 people mentioned it in the Telegram chat.
Our guy did not read the Telegram chat.
On day three, the dev sold everything. One transaction. 41% of supply dumped into an LP with $220,000 of liquidity. The token dropped 99.2% in four minutes.
His $91,400 position is now worth $731.
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TOTAL RETURN -$90,669.00 ▼ $91,400.00 (-99.20%) All Time 1H 4H 1D 3D ALL | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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"Put my entire personal loan into $LUNARBRO. The dev deleted the Telegram." Took a personal loan at 11.9% APR. Put all of it into a Solana memecoin I found on pump.fun because the chart was going up and the whitepaper had diagrams of moon robots. The dev wallet had 41% supply. I didn't check. Token went to zero in four minutes. Position is now worth $731. Loan payment is $1,840/month for the next five years.
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| Quick primer on pump.fun liquidity for non-crypto people: On Solana, anyone can launch a token in about 90 seconds. The dev sets how much liquidity backs the token. If the liquidity isn't locked, the dev can pull it all out in one transaction - taking everyone's money with it. The only defense is checking whether liquidity is locked before you buy. Our guy did not check. |
The dev's wallet received $187,000 from the sale. It was bridged to Ethereum within the hour. The Telegram was deleted. The website returns a 404.
The moon robots were clip art. The loan payment is due on the 15th.
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TODAY'S CASUALTIES 💀
Not everybody can be Loss of the Day. But these two gave it a real shot.
Let's run through the tape.
Casualty #1: The Capital Markets Day Gambler
There's a specific kind of trader who buys weekly options before a corporate event because they read one bullish headline. This is that trader.
Novo Nordisk held its Capital Markets Day on September 21. The thesis: management would announce a blockbuster obesity drug pipeline and the stock would gap up.
u/pharma_catalyst_king bought 300 NVO $44 call contracts expiring September 26. Total outlay: $55,200.
Novo announced its strategy. Investors wanted specifics. They got "more than five drugs with multi-blockbuster potential by 2030."
Translation: nothing new. Nothing concrete. The stock dropped 8% in one session. From $43.24 to $39.80.
Those $44 calls went from $1.84 to $0.03. His position is now worth $900. Loss: $54,300.
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POSITION P&L -$54,300.00 ▼ 300x NVO $44C 9/26 (-98.37%) 1D 1W 1M 3M ALL | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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"CMD was supposed to be the catalyst." Bought 300 NVO $44 weeklies ahead of Capital Markets Day. Thesis was obesity pipeline announcement would send it. Got vague 2030 targets instead. Stock fell 8% in a day. Top comment: "Capital Markets Day is for the company, not for your weekly calls."
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| Why weekly options are a coin flip on steroids: A weekly call option expires in days, not months. It needs the stock to move fast and in the right direction. An 8% drop doesn't just hurt - it vaporizes the entire premium. Buying weeklies ahead of a corporate event is paying full price for a lottery ticket where the drawing already happened. |
It was a catalyst. Just in the wrong direction.
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Casualty #2: The Sterling Bull Who Forgot About Rate Hikes
This one's quick because the liquidation was quick. Thirty-eight minutes quick.
u/macro_king_fx went long GBP/USD at 1.3385 with 50x leverage. The thesis: the Fed just hiked rates to 3.75-4.00%, but it was priced in. The dollar was peaking. Sterling had room to run.
For context: 50x leverage on forex means a 2% move against you wipes out your entire margin.
On September 21, oil prices dropped around 4% on Iran ceasefire hopes. Risk-on sentiment flooded the market. But the dollar strengthened anyway. GBP/USD fell.
His $38,200 margin was liquidated in 38 minutes.
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POSITION P&L -$38,200.00 ▼ LIQUIDATED - 38 MIN HELD 5M 15M 1H 4H 1D | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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The trade was technically sound on Friday. By Monday morning, the dollar had other plans. He had a thesis. He did not have a stop loss. Only one of those keeps you in the game.
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BITE-SIZED COPIUM FOR THE ROAD 🍪
The best part of any loss thread isn't the screenshot. It's the comments section.
Here are today's greatest hits.
| • | "The whitepaper had diagrams. DIAGRAMS." Sir, so does a children's coloring book. Neither is an investment thesis. - u/charts_not_smarts |
| • | "CMD was supposed to be the catalyst." It was a catalyst. For a $54,300 lesson in reading the room. - u/event_driven_to_zero |
| • | "The ceasefire should have weakened the dollar." It didn't. The Fed just hiked to 3.75-4.00% and the greenback didn't care about your risk-on thesis. Macro is just astrology for people with Bloomberg terminals. - u/stopped_out_again |
| • | "I'm actually up if you measure in $LUNARBRO." That is technically true and also the saddest sentence written today. - u/copium_dealer_99 |
Translation: the copium supply chain remains fully operational. The self-awareness supply remains on indefinite backorder.
See you tomorrow. New losses, fresh copium, same dosage.
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